Poking a Dead Frog by Mike Sacks

• All great comedy has managed to circumnavigate executive meddling. But this is easier said than done.
• Always be worn on your own material.
• Other people’s ideas are never as important as yours.
• Complacency is a classic mistake.
• Writing isn’t a thing you ever figure out--ever.
• Write and perform comedy constantly and relentlessly for years and years until you’re awesome at it, all the while making tons of great friends in the comedy world. Eventually, one of those friends will get their foot in the door of “showbiz”, and opportunities will begin to open for you.
• If I had to give any closing piece of advice it would be to make sure you like what you’re doing, to put yourself out there, in terms of your work. Also, just be a human being. Be nice to people and don't be crazy, which sounds very general, but that’s appreciated professionally. You can be a nice, energetic, funny person, but still not alienate anyone.
• You know, having a writers’ room is very conducive to getting nothing done. You get a lot of people in there and you go off on tangents and people are going to the bathroom and going out and getting coffee. Everybody just wants to get out of that room.
• If you approach everything from a pure creative angle, the work and employment will take care of itself. People don’t like others who constantly ask them for work. People find that off-putting. That’s not the way to do it. Just be around and engage people in a pure way and you’re going to get more work that way.
• What is really comes down to is that life is short and these things should be fun.
• It’s really about jumping in and doing it, and just starting to write, starting to make sketches and movies, and just putting them up on the Internet no matter who or where you are. You just have to start doing it--even if you’re not getting paid.
• Part of success is just starting something, working toward a goal, and then living long enough to achieve it.
• You usually struggle in the dark for years and years. The trick is that if you love it enough you’ll keep going. For people who don’t truly like it, those are the people who usually fade away. Those are usually the ones who say, “I want to be famous. I want everyone to look at me.” That type of person weeds itself out at a certain point.
• The truth is, in a writers’ room--and specifically in comedy, because you do so much together and it’s such a group process--if you’re not fun to hang out with, and you don’t have that self-awareness, you’re not going to do as well.
• If you want to write for television, I strongly suggest that you watch a lot of television. Like, a lot. If you want to write movies, I strongly suggest watching a ton of movies.
• Writing for free will make you write a lot, which is the only way to become a better writer. Everyone knows that reading a book about how to write comedy is a big joke. You just have to do it.
• The most common joke-killer, by far, is The Simpsons, because they’ve already made every joke ever.
• When it comes to writing advice, there really is no such thin. No one who’s successful knows exactly how their path has led to their success. Every journey is different. It doesn’t matter how Erma Bombeck did it, because your path is your own and no one else’s
• Write what you think is funny. This does not mean anyone else will agree, but if you write what you hope others will think is funny, you have already alienated at least some readers.
• If you aren’t willing to do something for free at first, no one is going to pay for it later. It is called “paying your dues” for a reason.
• If this is about money for you, you are very confused about where all the money is hidden.
• It is almost never worth arguing with someone on the Internet about anything--ever.
• If you are lucky enough to get an audience for your comedy, be nice to that audience. You are lucky to have them.
• You don’t have to be a writer or a comedian.
• Writing is boring and solitary and lonely and awful. Comedy is even worse.
• Make friends with smart, funny, highly motivated, encouraging, wonderful people who are more talented than you.
• You need at least one great sample script. But if you are an sprigin writer, you should always be writing.
• Don’t kid yourself: A lot of people fade away. A lot of people become tragic, whether they see it that way or not. I don’t know. There’s always this weird thing in show business where you never know when success is going to happen. It’s not a meritocracy; so much of it is about some weird shit aligning that’s usually out of your control, and you catch your break. And a lot of people don’t ever catch it.
• Agents never want to admit that they don’t do a great job handling the submissions they receive but, well, they don’t.
• Don’t count on them coming to you. You’ll always be remembered by the ones you tracked down.
• Read your stuff out loud. Sometimes the way it reads in your head sounds different when someone says ti.
• Be open to changing all the material you think is really brilliant.
• There’s always some better way to do things when you’re working with good people.
• Just put in the time, and don't be too precious about things. Work with your friends. And maybe, eventually, you’ll get paid.
• When you’re writing something, and it makes you laugh, don’t judge that. Even if it doesn’t seem to fit. If it made you laugh out loud, it probably belongs on the page.
• Have trust in amusing yourself.
• I tell people this all the time, that stand-up, even if you don’t want to be a comedian, makes you write, and it forces you to make the material good, because by doing stand-up you’re defending your own jokes. You can’t just write them down.
• Stand-up is kind of like getting your bachelor’s degree. Or getting a law degree. You can do a lot with it. [...] If you get into stand-up and you become a producer, or you become an actor, or you become a writer, it’s not like you’ve failed as a comic. It’s just that being a comic gives you the skills to move onto the next job.
• There are all kinds of different paths to get to places, but you have to work your butt off. You have to work for a long time to do it. There’s no real shortcut. No one cares how you dress for an interview.
• Start a blog and write monologue jokes every day.
• Woody Allen is quoted as saying, “Eighty percent of success is showing up.”
• At some point, you’ve got to do it.
• Everything’s been done. I really think that. All you’re doing is variations on a theme. There’s an obsession with novelty and freshness, but often that’s just repackaging something that people haven’t seen for awhile. It’s writing something that you think will be funny, that you will enjoy seeing.
• The interesting thing about comedy writing is that you’re doing this very creative, often very personal thing, but you’re expected to produce in this totally non creative way.
• I would say that the best humor comes from things you’re passionate about. Write what you’re passionate about, and what you know about, and it always translates better.
• I always tell aspiring comedy writers, “Just write as much as you can. That’s the only way you’re going to get better at it.” Do it anyway you can--write a bunch of jokes on Twitter, start a web series, start a funny Tumblr--anything. Just produce funny writing and eventually it’ll get noticed.
• All it takes is one person in the comedy business to notice you and find your stuff funny.
• If you get any success in comedy, help out your friends who are trying to do the same but who might not have a job yet.
• Help each other out, and everybody wins.
• Rewriting is writing. [...] Rewriting is everything.